Ryan and Travis: Another Bachelorette Commentary


Hands down, Ryan is gorgeous, funny, charming, endearing. On the flip side, what he wants in a woman is much like a robot: not too emotional, logical, servant, etc. Some of the attributes on his list are good of course, like faithful, but as Emily says, there is nothing on his list about love. Kind of sad. And when he leaves her after not getting the rose, the one thing he really focuses on is how he looks, how his personality is portrayed, on camera. Not one tear. Because he knows getting women is not difficult for him. And I think he assumes that he will be the next Bachelor.

As for Travis, your heart just breaks. Look at the difference between Travis leaving, Alejandro leaving, and Ryan. Profound difference. And I just wanted to yell at my television, “Yes Travis, you will find someone!” But of course that would have been pathetic, so I didn’t yell it. I just thought it. It’s a toss up for me between Alejandro and Travis for the new Bachelor. Or that sweet man, sorry I can’t remember his name, with the disability. As I said before, this group of guys, especially the ones left now, have huge hearts, and real emotion, like Doug did on Monday. It made my heart hurt. They all deserve someone amazing, and what they don’t know is that they will probably get more offers of love than they can handle. I just hope they find someone perfect for each of them.

Anyway, just my thoughts, and I already know I am too committed to watching other people fall in love instead of finding my own. I just don’t know what that feels like, so I stay away from it rather than walking toward it. I didn’t know that PTSD was why I never could connect to anyone. Why I couldn’t stay. Or love very deeply. So I live vicariously through all the romance movies and novels and reality shows, and that’s how I feel anything at all.

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The Real Story: Living in Hollywood


When I was about 19 I moved to Los Angeles from the Bay Area. My sister lived down there and I wanted a change.

And that’s where I met Michael Douglas.

He was hosting this marathon or whatever it was, on Hollywood Blvd. I got wind of it, and walked early in the morning down that famous street.

I saw the podium built, and I saw Michael Douglas standing on it.

Not many people were around then. Just his crew.

I walked up to the podium and he looked at me. I was pretty hot back then 🙂

I smiled, didn’t dare climb the stairs, and took out my business card.

I said “hi,” and handed it to him. He smiled.

I said, “If you ever need anyone to write music for your movies, just give me a call.”

He smiled again. He looked at the card. Looked back at me.

I stood there at the podium for a few more minutes just looking out at the street. I could see he was still looking at me.

Then I said, “Well, good-bye.” And I left.

I bet I was the most unassuming person he’s ever met.